Letter from Satsang: That Which Is Prior to Consciousness
Dear Fredness,
Wonderful Satsang today, as always. The last few minutes brought tears down my cheeks just as they did during our awakening session. As you were talking about the one woman’s awakening, there was a recognition that my awakening was very much like hers. The darkness, the vastness, the Nothing-ness. I do not recall any sense of fear in that moment, there was no desire to leave even as you began bringing back in the stars, sun, moon etc.
On that note, that was in that moment, there is a reoccurring arising, a thought, which causes suffering, something to do with aging, the changes of the physical form as the years go by, and the thought, life is short in physical form. In this time, space reality there is the experience of…..taste, smell, touch, sound, sight, an animal’s unconditional love, the touch of your mate, the sunrise, sunset, vastness of the sky, the moon, stars, the cool crisp smell of autumn, even the moments of suffering, and struggling, the aliveness of it all. None of which existed in the Nothing-ness. Ah ha, fear, attachment, identification with physical form, believing the thought that life in this physical form is short……
I’m aware of the thought patterns, which if I believe, do cause suffering. I have many moments during the day into sleep where thoughts continuously float by. Most do just float by or there maybe an inquiry about its truth. Yes, one only experiences the past or future as a thought, which seems to be the general cause of suffering when you believe a thought or want What Is to be different. This one thought does not pop up often nor does it stick around, but when it does the emotions attached to it are yucky, sucked right out of the moment. Yes, they are going to arise until they don’t.
Not sure what compelled me to write this…looking forward to the next Satsang. Looking forward to your post on inquiry.
Very, very nice new background. It’s evolved!
….and verbal nor written communication flows out of this unit with ease, or very clear to the point, is there a point….Is that a judgement! Oh, a sense of humor here……
Much love, Barb
In this same satsang, I told the story about an afternoon in my living room with two students. I had “gone public” on the topic of Noneness some time before, and they were pressing me to share whatever description was possible. I told them that I truly could not put it into words, but that I would try. I started talking, and then there was Noneness, and then I passed out. A few seconds later I came to, looked at them and smiled, and said, “Well I guess that’s as close as I can get!”
F
