The Awards We’ve All Been Waiting For

            CERTIFICATE OF AWAKENING

IT IS HEREBY PROCLAIMED THAT AS OF NOW_________________ OF __________________ IS AWARDED THIS OFFICIAL CERTIFICATE OF AWAKENING THROUGH THE AUSPICES OF THE UNDERSIGNED COMMITTEE MEMBERS OF THE BONAFIDE SOCIETY OF CERTIFIED NONDUALISTS.

IT IS CERTIFIED THAT HE/SHE HAS DISCOVERED NOTHING AND REALIZED THAT (HE/SHE) IS NOBODY.                   HE/SHE NOW UNDERSTANDS THAT THERE IS NOTHING TO UNDERSTAND BECAUSE NOBODY UNDERSTANDS NOTHING.

CONSEQUENTLY HE/SHE LEARNED THAT HIS/HER SEARCH FOR THE TRUTH WAS A BIG JOKE.  AND THAT HE/SHE WAS THE BUTT OF THE JOKE.

AFTER HIS/HER SEARCH ENDED SHE DISCOVERED THAT WHO HE/SHE THOUGHT HE/SHE WAS NOT WHO HE/SHE THOUGHT SHE WAS AND THAT WHO HE/SHE IS SIMPLY WHAT IS.

HE/ SHE IS NOW ENTITLED TO ENJOY WHO HE/SHE IS EVEN THOUGH HE/SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THAT IS

HE//SHE IS NOW FREE.  .BECAUSE NO MATTER WHAT HE/SHE DOES, HE/SHE WILL ALWAYS BE DOING EXACTLY WHAT HE/SHE HAS TO BE DOING.  WHICH IS WHAT HE/SHE WAS ALREADY DOING BEFORE HE/SHE DISCOVERED THAT THAT WHAT HE/SHE WAS DOING.

SIGNED, ________________________________     DATE:___________________

OFFICIAL REPRESENTATIVE OF THE OFFICIAL BONAFIDE SOCIETY OF CERTIFIED NONDUALISTS

Thanks to Thomas & Lloyd

I’ve found out that this “mockument” was penned by Paul Hedderman, so thanks to Paul as well!