There was a really nice rhythmic tapping during the last few seconds (foot tapping I’m guessing). Very comforting sound effect to go with the message.
What if I didn’t “do” anything? (because I “have” to – something’s not quite right and my squirminess is unsittable – I can’t escape the pull of the gravity well of “must alter” while being pushed by the squirm)
I think I would notice more. Half way through flossing, my “ugh, I still have half more to go!” has been a common “have to”. Changing the choice to “I’m feeling this side of this tooth right now with this string action” with real attendance, then I’m more in love with this than the heavy weight of time and drudgery I was just imagining. Being alert to so many other thought patterns that are ready to rush in though is just as key. “So what”, “how can altering the time span or the label of the activity change the perception”, “i’m proving the dismal state by trying to invent coping mechanisms”, etc. I had the experience of drugging and drinking, and coming to relate to “one is too many, a thousand is never enough”, so now I get it’s exactly the same pattern with “so many other thoughts”.
So I’m back to loving that side of the tooth, and now feeling my fingers and typing and the keyboard. This noticing came together more for me in realizing that noticing IS what not judging – myself – is. It can seem like a small window of opportunity, like loving that one side of the tooth, but those windows are disproportionately grander in the view they offer when I choose their view. And I have a feeling that those “small” windows can merge together to become even in the dream that ONE clear transparent glass that gets referred to.
And I still love, “when one surrenders, What Is “seems” to surrender back”!
These seeings are the windows and doors into the extraordinary ordinary. I want nothing more.
Which is a good thing, since there isn’t more.
This is It.
And it is plenty.
As a dear friend told me today, “We are abundance.”
Once we see that, the craving for more begins to subside.
(Although it can take a quite a while for them to completely sink.)
And Mike, you once had a drinking problem over which you were powerless. Now you’re sober enough to notice that you have a thinking problem–over which you are powerless. 🙂 You just keep putting one foot in front of the other. I’ve seen a tremendous amount of progress in you (just languaging!) in the last couple of years.
And you have an enviable level of humility–something Fredness could always use more of. Perhaps you’ll send me a box of it. 🙂
February 27, 2016 @ 7:42 pm
There was a really nice rhythmic tapping during the last few seconds (foot tapping I’m guessing). Very comforting sound effect to go with the message.
What if I didn’t “do” anything? (because I “have” to – something’s not quite right and my squirminess is unsittable – I can’t escape the pull of the gravity well of “must alter” while being pushed by the squirm)
I think I would notice more. Half way through flossing, my “ugh, I still have half more to go!” has been a common “have to”. Changing the choice to “I’m feeling this side of this tooth right now with this string action” with real attendance, then I’m more in love with this than the heavy weight of time and drudgery I was just imagining. Being alert to so many other thought patterns that are ready to rush in though is just as key. “So what”, “how can altering the time span or the label of the activity change the perception”, “i’m proving the dismal state by trying to invent coping mechanisms”, etc. I had the experience of drugging and drinking, and coming to relate to “one is too many, a thousand is never enough”, so now I get it’s exactly the same pattern with “so many other thoughts”.
So I’m back to loving that side of the tooth, and now feeling my fingers and typing and the keyboard. This noticing came together more for me in realizing that noticing IS what not judging – myself – is. It can seem like a small window of opportunity, like loving that one side of the tooth, but those windows are disproportionately grander in the view they offer when I choose their view. And I have a feeling that those “small” windows can merge together to become even in the dream that ONE clear transparent glass that gets referred to.
And I still love, “when one surrenders, What Is “seems” to surrender back”!
March 1, 2016 @ 11:45 pm
These seeings are the windows and doors into the extraordinary ordinary. I want nothing more.
Which is a good thing, since there isn’t more.
This is It.
And it is plenty.
As a dear friend told me today, “We are abundance.”
Once we see that, the craving for more begins to subside.
(Although it can take a quite a while for them to completely sink.)
And Mike, you once had a drinking problem over which you were powerless. Now you’re sober enough to notice that you have a thinking problem–over which you are powerless. 🙂 You just keep putting one foot in front of the other. I’ve seen a tremendous amount of progress in you (just languaging!) in the last couple of years.
And you have an enviable level of humility–something Fredness could always use more of. Perhaps you’ll send me a box of it. 🙂
All love,
Fredness